Tough...

If you don't know already when we moved here to lovely Napa CA we also decided to make a smart decision and stay with my parents. We aren't there rent free or without responsiblities but it made it easier than stressing over this business of RC's taking off and getting our own place then ya know...the worst happening and it flopping. NOT that it has or will but we had to think smart.

Anywho, I haven't talked much about living at my parents or how daily life goes on but here is the breakdown. We have two rooms Rian stays in an "upstairs" portion of our room, yes they are divided like two little rooms. The girls stay in their room and share just like they always have so that part works out. The girls get ready and listen to us a majority of the time, although as you can imagine they still get orders from the grandparents as needed.

Now when we lived alone it didn't matter if a kid cried or acted up and we maybe just didn't feel like dealing with it because it was our house and well...we could do as we pleased. HOWEVER, since living at my parents we have either been more leniant in certain areas or more strict. That is where the tough part comes in. You never know when you will offend someone or when they might offend you but either way you have to try and take it all into consideration.

Here comes Rian and the girls...We were at home the other night and I think it was my toughest night ever. We had a great night, we were all getting along but the kids were extra poopy. Now Rian has a temper as do the girls so we try not to react or get mad in a way that shows them its "okay" or that "mommy and daddy do it" however my dad has a little bit a rougher edge so he yells and would probably spank if I let him...but lucky for me hasn't tried so no akwardness there laying the smack down on my dad. Haha. I HIGHLY doubt he would overstep those boundaries. ANYWAYS, sorry, little off track. Well we got the girls taken care of, and we were doing okay with Rian, he would throw cry fits but we DO try to reason with him even if he can't understand it cause we don't just wanna yell or punish then reason with him later so we do our best. WELL my dad thinks is silly so we were all sitting at the table and Rian slammed his car on the table (out of frustration cause it wouldnt hook up to the other tow truck car he was playing with)...welllll...as an automatic reaction my dad slammed his fist on the table and yelled "dang boy, don't do that!" in a very stern angry voice. Needless to say it didn't really phase Rian in a "uh oh" kind of way but he got scared and cried of course. I sat there, as his mom scared to pick him up or comfort him and was even in shock but in the end RIan was fine and told Grandpa he was sorry (even though of course my dad says he is sure RIan isn't really sorry...ugh...he's two!).

The whole tough thing is that although my dad raised us and it's fine and we are normal I don't know that I want my kids to have to hear yelling or anger. Granted it works with the girls, grandpa gets upset once and they don't do it again but Rian has never been handled like that so it kinda got to me. I was upset and sad and confused cause it worked really. Rian cried, got over it and went about his business and loved grandpa no more no less.

Now okay, I am kinda losing my point here but the point I started with was, that although we made this decision to live with my parents its tough seeing them parent as they parented us, mostly because I wanted to raise my kids different. DOESN'T mean we don't raise our voices and that they don't get in trouble but not without explaining what they did or talking it out or anything. AGAIN, I know Rian is young but even at that age my dad had to see he was just frustrated, why yell at him for showing his frustration and then showing him another option to just freaking out. Ya know?

Well that is it sorry if I vented and got everyone lost along the way. Just needed to get it all out. Ughhhh.